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Welcome to Failed First Dates, the game that takes you across the universe's infinite dimensions on a journey like no other as you catch up on all the dating-time you've missed out on. During this journey, you will find clues to help you escape these scenarios, lest you be stuck in a time loop sitting across from . . . 






Once you collect all the clues, you will be able to piece together your portal gun which lets you move on to a new universe, one with (hopefully) better oral hygiene standards and a higher concentration of Bernard Sanders. Sadly your portal gun mathematics only let you go as far as jumping at random, but as you progress through the levels you will find clues to help you piece it back together and find yourself sitting across the table from the best date of your life, your mystery man:

Couple On A Date Silhouette



If you do not make it to your final date on time, your mystery man will be kidnapped by the evil space wizard Gnargnard the ALL POWERFUL, an evil being with the power to make people disbelieve in science. The only way to defeat Gnargnard across all of the infinite realities in the cosmos is to unite with the mystery man, and use the powers you've gained along the way to cast Gnargnard into the pits of Erythreum where he will be banished for all of eternity.

When you are ready, click here to let your date know that you're ready.

Good luck!

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